Shop Mobile More Submit  Join Login
About Deviant underorionUnited States Recent Activity
Deviant for 3 Years
Needs Core Membership
Statistics 190 Deviations 320 Comments 2,433 Pageviews

Newest Deviations

Random Favourites

deviation in storage by sleepysheepdog


This instance of you
is a star born from my heart
and I'm breathing you out
breathing you in

we are one and nothing can
break that
change it
shake us

we are one and our castle is strong
we belong here

we are fire and ink
sky and storm
gold and
like the ring I slipped on your finger
when I asked you to be mine

we are one, and we're twined all together
like a vine growing wrapped round a tree
you hold me up
lift me to the sun
and I give you the closeness you need
no one else sees the tears
that are the colour of your eyes
when I kiss them away
your eyes are the colour of my tears
when he's thinking about it
I can see the thought as he thinks it
wanting to lean in and kiss you
and my skin sets aflame
and my hackles raise
I am trying not to leap
angry at my own anger
trying not to cry
and let go of tears the colour of your eyes

this has happened before
so many times
the back and forth
the to and fro
and each time, treating the other
like they do not have worth:
what is friendship?
I think he has forgotten

he has had his chance with each of us;
but we are each the other's,
through and through
(no to and fro here anymore;
we have learned, and we know)

this will fall

(I am cloaked in frustration,
a choking cloud)

this will fall

sure as light;

this will fall

you are mine
I am yours

this will fall.
I am feeling and feeling and feeling
so many nameless things
so many unanswered questions
blue spiderwebs etched into my hands
black rebar wrapped around my waist
holding me up
grey fur rippling from my soul's skin
I am wondering personified
and I don't know how to say the things I'm thinking
the things I'm speaking and calling
the paths I want to walk
yet still don't understand
and I am feeling my skin crawl
human skin, so much less comforting
than the inner dream of
soft pelt and inky paws
here where I'm lost, I'm lost, I'm lost
I am wishing
for the ones that I know, who don't exist
but make my heart ache for them
and I'm waiting
for the chance to leap up and take the path
to the one I know who's just out of reach
and thousands of miles away
and endless distance away
there are trails and roads and lanes
I am going to breath in
side by side with those who
have my life
I am hoping and lost and distressed
and I hardly know what I'm feeling
my heart is in knots
with the colour of a dozen pairs of eyes
I can see in my mind
and a face filled with light
and a quick-beating heart
and a warm gentle breath
and the rose-vines that are love
and I'm lost
please step out of words
please cross the impossible distances
please come back this way
please stay
I'm only waiting here
to touch your hand again
to touch your heart again
I'm lost, please come to find me

I'm so lost
this knight of grey is lost
486 deviations
I let the world
crack and fall and spin away
out from under my feet
and I'm floating in space
with my grey fur kissed by the silent sun

I am letting go
the battle I was fighting
I've surrendered
or merely finished my turn
(it doesn't matter)

and thoughts that are swarming my head
I've been defeated
by what I have always
been too blind to see

a realisation, again
of my own lack of
useful purpose
I can kick off and float out to space
you won't find me here
(or even look)

I press my shaggy head
into your shoulder
into your waiting hands
that cradle me close
though a wolf has no tears
for sadness
you understand this,
(I hope)

I'm letting go
and the things that I once
thought to be worth fighting for
are dissolving all around me
I can see now that they were illusions
but it doesn't matter now

you say it's your turn now
and that I can get some rest
I am so weary
fighting has taken away
every last inch of me
and I'm ready to fall
without regard to where

there's a cruel twist, somewhere in there
but I should have known
it would come knocking for me
this isn't the first
and my heart is too torn
for this to succeed
though you've dangled it on a string
in front of me

and it's funny
that what, I would say, is the center
of my being
you can not, do not, will not
(and maybe you aren't worth it)

but the battle's over
for me, if not for good
this wolf bows to this lion
and lets him take over
I am too weary
with my fur in mats
and streaked with blood
my paws are worn
and I'm seeing double
and my heart's in shreds
but I'm feeling nothing
I am done
I'm done

I'm done.


United States
I am a fool for adventures;

I love getting mail(especially from people I love).

I am who I am. Nothing more or less.
My, it has been a long time. Oh, the stories I could tell you, my friends. Life has been borderline insane of late.
Long ago, I met someone wonderful; and we came together. We are still together, and for nearly two years, now; I hope this remains so. There are questions in it, now.
Regardless, I believe we will revolve around each other for quite some time. This one, my much-loved, had cancer, like poison in his lungs. But we made it through this. Even I, despite who and how I am, did pray for him. He is healthy again. We were very lucky.  We still are; there have been further scares with his health. And now, with mine. There is fear in my heart. The bone of my skull is deeply infected, at this point. I have been a sickly wreck for months. It may be the death of me, in the long run. I am afraid.
Should I not, however, there is hope. I wish to go somewhere better, and I; we; are pursuing it. Things may yet get better. I may struggle out of the waves at last, though they try their best to drag me under.
Wish me luck.

AdCast - Ads from the Community



Add a Comment:
anapests-and-ink Featured By Owner Dec 7, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you so much for the watch and all the favs!
LadyBitterblue Featured By Owner Dec 5, 2014   Writer
You write wonderfully. I hope you're doing well and have a beautiful day. :heart:
LadyLincoln Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you for your :+devwatch: I appreciate the support!

With love,
imaginative-lioness Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Thank-you so much for taking the time to add 'Soldier' to your favourites, it truly means a lot! Hope you have a wonderful day. :heart:

:huggle: :love:
Nullibicity Featured By Owner Jun 25, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
:iconthxfavplz: It's warmly appreciated! :happybounce::thanks:
Add a Comment: